Confessions From Victims Of Big Families…Whoa!

Are you from a big family? Do you have 4 kids or more? Well, then perhaps this sounds familiar to you….These are true life confessions of people with large families, and many many kids. The struggle is real people….

So we had our 4 kids plus a foster kid when I got this text


We had 1 kid, adopted another, then had twins. Then I got a vasectomy. My follow-up test showed I was still fertile, so I got another vasectomy. That follow up test was clear. Four years later, this happened. Yes I got my fertility tested, I am fertile again. Yes the baby is mine.


I know there are bigger families than mine, 5 kids plus 1-2 foster kids is a lot, enough to outgrow a minivan. We drive a huge full-size van. People stare, it’s good fun. Hope you like white, because almost all of them come off the line in white. The white van is a badge of honor, a right of passage. Embrace it.


No grocery trip is ever less than $200, even a quick run after work. This is an actual trip where I managed to fill the cart for just under $200, I was so proud that I took a picture. Usually I do 2 trips, one for non-refrigerated items, then load the car, then go back in for just refrigerated items. It helps you get around the individual purchase limit on debit cards too if you forget to call the bank and get it increased.


I make bread most Sundays, it tastes better and may or may not be cheaper. The kids get involved, and I am teaching them life skills, or something. Recipes that are done by weight are more accurate and more consistent, but most people don’t bake 5 pounds at a time.


We tend to buy bulk foods, and one time I accidentally got the same brand of foodservice grade supplies. Apparently I am a hoosier hill farm brand loyalist. I do weird stuff like cure my own beef and bacon, so I buy supplies most people don’t. We buy as much stuff as possible in bulk industrial form.


At the grocery store when you buy a huge amount of stuff including 8 1/2 gallon milk containers, and don’t use SNAP or WIC, they ask for your Tax ID number. Sometimes they even offer to look your tax number up for you… Nope, not a charity, just a million kids.


Christmas is important to us, because consumerism is fun and presents are awesome (thought we were religious for a second there, didn’t you?). We spend almost half the year planning and paying for this great and terrible holiday, it isn’t like we give them extravagant presents or anything, but everything adds up. The kids love it, it’s worth it.


People ask all the time why we homeschool. When they see us with 5 (or 7) kids and a white van they just assume we are crazy fundies who don’t want them learning about science or something. This is my go to excuse. We go on vacations during the school year.


The truth about why we do it is because each kid is different and I want my kids to have a customized education. Homeschool doesn’t mean they never leave home to go to school… it means they are ALWAYS at school muahaha. Anyway here is a picture of us dissecting a pig heart.

Do you feel exhausted just from reading that? Share with friends!

Via Imgur

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